Trudging Through Lord of the Rings

I’ve read time and again that the Lord of the Rings Trilogy (which is actually not a trilogy, but one massive book published in 3 parts) has all kinds of allegorical content and contains a lot of stuff Peter Jackson had to leave out of the movies.  Well, they’re certainly right about Mr Jackson leaving material out of the movie.  I’m on page 160 (reading during my lunch breaks) and I’d have to say that roughly 90% of what I’ve read does not appear in any form in the movie.  I’m about a little less than halfway through the first book (in the size they’ve printed) and the main characters JUST got to The Prancing Pony.  I think this happens in the first 10 or so minutes in the movie.  And what a great idea to cut all that chaff was!

I have absolutely no idea how the Lord of the Rings became such a revered book amongst the fantasy crowd.  Tolkien appears not to have had an editor, or perhaps his editor was a pushover.  If I were his editor I would certainly have made him remove the stupid chapter and a half about Tom Bombadil.  This chapter does not further the story in any way and just leaves you with the same feeling as when you thought you’d be getting lucky to realize that your girl was only wearing the sexy panties because everything else is in the laundry basket.  I kept reading thinking that Tom Bombadil would drop some bombs about some key part of the story or that the Black Riders would show up and tear his place apart and  kill his wife.  Oh, and the insufferable singing!  It didn’t even make any sense!  What’s with everyone speaking in the third person?  Eric doesn’t like that.

And the hobbits are always breaking into song.  One could be forgiven for thinking that Peter Jackson would have make Lord of the Rings the Musical.  They sing songs about everything from travel, to hotels, to taking baths.  And I’ve found out more about hobbit genealogy than I ever cared for.

Interestingly, the relationship between Frodo and Sam doesn’t seem to have the same sexual overtones that it does in the movie.  And, I’m pretty sure Peter Jackson didn’t do that on purpose.  It just came out so ridiculous that TBS had everyone almost literally rotfltao when they had a commercial for their broadcast of LoTR featuring clips of Frodo and Sam and the song “Secret Lovers”.

At any rate, this is mostly a rant about how slow-going this book is.  Had it not had so many decades of reputation to rest upon, I would have probably returned the book to Borders and not even attempted to finish.  Then again, I found the movies really boring, so perhaps the Lord of the Rings just isn’t for me.  Ironically, I’m loving Terry Prachet’s Discworld series which is, partly, a parody of the Tolkien universe.

2 responses to “Trudging Through Lord of the Rings”

  1. Every time I rant about how boring Tom Bombadil is someone always chimes up to tell me that he somehow makes it worth it later on or how he’s important in some esoteric way. Honestly, I can’t remember him doing anything of the sort, but since you’ve already passed his part of the book, be comforted by the fact that the rest of it is relatively interesting. Ringwraiths should start showing up soon.

    Don’t go thinking that Frodo and Sam are straight yet, they haven’t started the rough part of the journey yet. Be ready for PLENTY of weeping. Honestly, I’ve never heard of grown hobbits crying as much as these two seem to…

  2. Well, I got to the part where Frodo got stabbed by the Dark Riders and Sam starting crying about what would happen to his “Master”. Oh, how the english language was so different back then. Imagine if they had let him call Frodo his master the movies. It would have been hard to explain.

    As far as Tom playing some worthwhile role in the book. I hardly think so. So far all he’s done is donate the hobbit ponies to the innkeeper at The Prancing Pony as compensation for money he had to pay to some skeeze-ball.