In our recent move, my wife and mother were on a mission to get rid of as much junk as possible as I’ve been labeled by them as a pack rat. I saved this poem from destruction. I don’t remember anything about it, not even the circumstances in which I wrote it. But here it is for you.

It’s no longer yours.
You can’t do what you want with it.
That’s like coming back to live in/remodel a house you’ve sold.
You see, the owner dictates what happens to his property, as demostrated in Merchant of Venice.
But what do you do if you’re caught in the moment?
Especially with the other being so tempting, so manipulative.
To give in is a breach of contract.
At the same time, you know the judge is forgiving.
As far as you know, there is no limit to the forgiveness.
Do you push it?
Test the limit?
Is one moment worth eternity?
Especially one quickly forgotten.
But…that IS the main question….
the one up for debate.
We have access to law books, but they are written in confusing jargon.
If only the judge would answer you directly.
Yet, he is a witty man.
His favorite means of communication is through metaphors and analogies.
So I stumble through the books looking for the answer.
How do you confront the other without risking it all?
It almost seems like one or the other.
There must be a compromise…
But right now… right now somewhere is as good as nowhere.
Patience is not my strength.
If it is wrong to do it directly, then can it be done indirectly?
Is it now right?
Half as wrong?
Still fully wrong?
I really need to know for I fear jail almost as much as the side effects/penalties.
In such a “now” world, it’s hard to consider eternity.
So now I continue to wonder…
I hope that I will somehow find the answer in the books.
Until that time I simply dreak making the decision.
Which will it be – the moment or eternity?

Eric Mesa