“The problem with internet quotes is that you can’t always depend on their accuracy”.

– Abraham Lincoln -1864

Burke said there were Three Estates in Parliament; but, in the Reporters’ Gallery yonder, there sat a Fourth Estate more important than they all. It is not a figure of speech, or a witty saying; it is a literal fact. Printing, which comes necessarily out of Writing, I say often, is equivalent to Democracy: invent Writing, Democracy is inevitable. Whoever can speak, speaking now to the whole nation, becomes a power, a branch of government, with inalienable weight in law-making, in all acts of authority. It matters not what rank he has, what revenues or garnitures: the requisite thing is that he have a tongue which others will listen to; this and nothing more is requisite.

“And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a small café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what it was that had been going wrong all this time, and she finally knew how the world could be made a good and happy place. This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything.”

[Very upper manager] will have a boner and give us money

-Co-worker at a meeting to create a PowerPoint to get our project funded

Co-worker1: You know that Snickers commercial? Co-worker2: Is that the one where you eat snickers if you are hungry?

“I could run China”

-Co-worker

In fact, according to mathematician Marc van Leeuwen, an “oldest person in the world” will die roughly every 0.65 years.

- Boing-Boing

Once again I share with you the funny (and in some cases, insightful) quotes I’ve gathered over the last few months:

I had this conversation with Duffy yesterday about how politicians need to hire me as a lifestyle coach “Hey Dan, should I pay all my taxes?” “Yes! Are you stupid?” “Hey Dan, should I solicit male prostitutes in the bathroom if I’m a conservative Republican?” “…No…”

Dan: I was ready to get lunch, but found out I’m not hungy. It sucks.

Here are some great quotes I’ve heard/read recently:

“It’s like asking for a rollercoaster when you want wasabi” - C.P.

Eric: “So what was your role in the musical?” CP: “I never had a role” MK: “Oh, you were mailbox #2”

“Antonio Banderas should not be doing bee commercials” - MK on Nasonex

“They’ve declared a jihad on clothes” - Dan imagines a terrorist porn tagline

“I was dreaming about cake” - Danielle

Time, once again, to unload some of the quotes I’ve recorded onto the blog:

“I always say, ‘If you can’t beat ’em …. Report them to Homeland Security. They’ll beat ’em for you’ " -Colbert on The Colbert Report 9 June 2008

?(03:25:23 PM) Danny: mom just gets pissed if we don’t eat three meals a day

“Under the Bush Administration, the value of human life has gone down $1 million” - Colbert on The Colbert Report 14 July 2008